Random 2

My heart aches for someone to understand what I’m feeling. It’s hard to open up to someone and say what I’m feeling. No one can really listen and understand without judging. I wish that I can find a stranger and pour my heart out but the problem is that I don’t think that I can even say what’s bothering me to a stranger. I’m always afraid of being judged. Always afraid of what would people think of me. Sometimes I say I don’t care what other people think why should i? But, who am I kidding I never stopped caring. I’m always too afraid I will disappoint not only everyone around me but to disappoint myself. I always here you did this wrong you did that wrong don’t you think I know what I did wrong? It hurts hearing that it really does. Knowing that you screwed so many times nobody even believes you? And why do you think I lie, for fun? No it’s to avoid further disappointments and embracement’s. You know how bad it feels to hear that you have no credibility. The problem is no one truly understands, not without judging, not without thinking why would you do that? I think I’ve been lying to myself too. I keep telling myself everything is ok, there is nothing you can’t fix, and it’s not too late. The problem is no one truly trusts me. So why should I give my trust to anyone? Who am I kidding I need to stop lying, face the truth and take charge of my life. I should just open a new page and fix up my life. I’m going to try to make this reality and not just words on the web.

A Lost Soul...

Poll

Should I start posting again or not? Please comment :)

Random

Today I was sitting in calculus class and I was bored. So, I started writing some stuff down and thought I would share it with you. I don't even know if anyone reads my blog but I just wanted to put it out there. :)
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Time is a fictional concept. We think we can control it, but the truth is it controls us. Seconds, minutes, hours just pass by and we have no control over them. It is not like we can stop it or make it move slower or faster.

You know how they say you are only young once. Well these days I have to remind myself that I'm still young. Pressure and fear of the future and what it holds, pressure from responsibilities is closing in on me. I feel like I'm suffocating. I can't even remember the last time I just spent a day doing nothing. Even my walks around my neighborhood that used to clear my mind started to pop more questions into my head. Sleep used to be my salvation. My safe haven the place where I can run away from my problems. However, now they are haunting my dreams too.

This imaginary concept we keep trying to manage is just an illusion. It is one of many obstacles that we face everyday. I just need a break. A break from my life.

Ooh what would I do to be a kid again. Everyone is in such a rush to grow up, but what's the point. Growing up we loose sight of many things in life. We start forgetting how to enjoy life. This race toward who can make money, who can by the prettiest things is ridiculous. All the riches in the world can't make time stop. And isn't that what all of us want. More time to spend with loved ones, more time to try new things. more time just to enjoy yourself. What's the rush?

If only someone would create a time machine I would love to go back to be a kid, or to at least warn the foolish naive kid that I was that life is not that easy. Growing up is not fun. A kid doesn't have any responsibilities, any obligations, any regrets. They live their lives day by day, filled with joy, happiness and laughs with not a care in the world.

I know that the world is not all bad. Life is beautiful, but sometimes we get sidetracked ,sucked into our own problems and we forget about the big picture, we forget about the beauty.

So, if anyone is reading no matter what the world throws your way you can handle it. Don't let it bring you down. Just keep in mind the good memories, the happy thoughts that make life worth living.


A Lost Soul...

Chapter Three

Chapter Three:

Sara’s point of view:

It has been a couple of days since I last saw Lulu. She ran out on me that day and we haven’t talked since. I’ve been calling her texting her and she wouldn’t answer. I thought she needed time alone and she will call me when she is ready to talk. I’ve been trying her on BBM too but she would read it and not answer.

Beep Beep I looked at my cellphone and it was a text from Lulu saying: Come to my place ASAP… No explanation, No nothing.

I decided to go, I changed hoped on the bus and sat there thinking. I can still remember the day I met Lulu. It was the first day of freshmen orientation in our university. I was homesick and didn’t feel like it but it was mandatory. It was Ramadan we were fasting, it was hot and we had to walk all around the university. 

The good thing was that I knew the group leader, he was my cousin's friend. 

I was talking to Salim a guy from Emirates who is a good friend of mine right now. We were having a lunch break, so they gathered everyone who is fasting together in the student center. Salim disappeared and left me alone. 

I was sitting on the couch texting my cousins telling them how I was stuck there with 20 annoying Saudi guys, who just stare and an Indian girl or that is what I thought. Khalid (The group leader, my cousin's friend. A junior from Algeria) came by and talked to me he was really nice he made me feel not so homesick. 

He went to see the rest of the group and I was stuck alone again. When...

Indian girl: Hi, how are you?

Me: Hey, I’m good. How are you?

Indian girl: I’m good. I’m Lulu by the way.

Me: Nice to meet you Lulu I’m Sara

Me: So where are you from?

Lulu: Kuwait, What about you?

Me: Saudi

.

.

.

I was really shocked when she said she was Kuwaiti. We just sat there and talked for a while. After that we were in the same dorms and we became really close. I still tease her about the fact that she looks like an Indian. She told me later that she was kind of pissed from me. She was thinking why wouldn’t this girl talk to me? She actually went and asked Salim if I was his sister; because we were the only Arab girl and guy talking. (Saudis are awkward) We still laugh about that. I don’t know how I would’ve survived the dorms and my first year without her.

I snapped out of my thoughts and realized that I reached her bus stop. I was really worried. Something had to be wrong for her to just disappear. I walked the familiar path to her place with a thousand thoughts running around in my head. I got there and knocked, the door opened…

Lulu(crying): Hey come in

Me: Hey what’s wrong honey?

I gave her a hug and she started crying more and more. Then she suddenly snapped out of it.

Lulu: I don’t want to talk about right now could you please just stay with me I really don’t want to be alone.

Me: Yeah of course,, Ana km Lulu 3ndee?

Lulu (with a smile): You are the best.

I was glad that I managed to make her smile. I never saw her this sad before.

Me: What about we go out? T’3yree jw shwy and you clear your mind

Lulu: Ok, where do you want to go to?

Me: What about the mall? You can do some shopping miss shopaholic

Lulu: Lol ok

Me: Come on go change your clothes and I will call a cab to pick us up

The creepiest taxi came to pick us up. He kept saying that he wants to take us to some guys from Dammam to party. According to him these guys are rich, handsome, they drink and smoke weed. We couldn’t wait to leave that cab but we got some good laughs out of that ride.

We finally got to the mall and guess who we bump into, Salim.

Salim: Hala wallah

Me and Lulu: Hala feek

Me: What are you doing here alone?

Salim: Jay ar89 y3nee aish aswee fee el mall I’m shopping.

Lulu: Lol he schooled you

Me: Y7sb nfsa thkee

Lulu: Can we join you?

Salim: Yeah of course I need some “fashion advice”

Me: Oh then you’re in luck you just found two fabulous ladies b5dmtk (and I stuck my tongue out at him)

We spent the whole afternoon shopping, laughing and teasing Salim about his taste in clothes. We had a lot of fun and decided to go out for dinner. 

This day was just what we needed a day to forget about the world and problems and just remember that we are young and have fun.

We left the mall and walked to Olive Garden. It was so crowded we had to wait for our table. While waiting we were just talking about random stuff and making fun of a clumsy waiter.

Salim: Shoofoo al7een b6y7 the soup on that lady.

Me: La moo 6bee3ee hada el ensan

Lulu: Jed, asw2 waiter fee el 7ayah

Me: Ooh and he does drop it on her, he should have his own show

Lulu: 5ala9 m8der 3lai

While standing there laughing really hard at the poor waiter two guys come through the doors.

Salim: Hala bel shabab

To be continued…

Chapter Two

I'm sorry I haven't posted in a couple of days but I was really busy with college. I don't know if anyone is reading the story but I hope you like this post. Sorry it's a short one I will try posting another one today :)

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Chapter 2:

Introducing a new character in this chapter:

Hamad is a 20 year old saudi guy. He is one of Sara’s best friends since they were kids. He studies in NYU. He is tall, dark and handsome.

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At Ali’s house:

Ali: Ha abu elshabab eshrayk fee el bait

Sultan: Wallah it is really nice

Sultan: Seems like you have a nice neighbor ;)

Ali: Ha,, aish 89dk?

Sultan: La ma 89dee shee

Ahmed (Ali’s roommate): Hey what’s the fuss?

Ali: Nothing t3rf Sultan w s5afta.

Ahmed: Yalla shabab nroo7 nl3b koora

Ali and Sultan: Eih yalla.

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Lulu: Sara aish feekee el youm kela msh’3ool balk

Sara: Ha ma fenee shee

Lulu: There is something going on with you today

Sara: 8ltlk ma fenee shee

Lulu: Ok you will tell me later you will tell me later

Sara didn’t feel like hanging out with Lulu today. She could be annoying and nosey sometimes.

Sara’s point of view:

Ma a3rf aish fenee el youm. I feel a bit lost. A7s my life is collapsing on me. My dad wants me to move to another university, because ours is too hard. I don’t want to move but I can’t say anything. I can’t tell Lulu about it, she won’t understand. Come on when is she leaving. I need to talk to Hamad or Samar they are the only two that truly understand me. I just need someone who is willing to listen.

Me: Lulu are you sleeping over?

Lulu: No, I’m leaving b3d shwy.

Me: Ok

Lulu: Why are you that sick of me?

Me: la eshd3wa just asking.

Me: What do you think NCIS marathon? (I felt bad I’ve been ignoring Lulu the whole day she didn’t do anything wrong I love this girl.)

Lulu: Yup!!

We sat for hours watching NCIS, laughing, eating popcorn and ordered pizza for dinner.

For some reason I kept thinking of Ali all the time. I don’t know why I never liked a guy this much especially a guy I don’t know. A guy that does not even know I exist till a couple of hours ago. I decided not to care anymore why am I so desperate to be friends with guy. I will just forget about him.

My thoughts were interrupted by Lulu’s ring tone. Lulu answered the phone and ran out...

To be continued…

Chapter One

I would really appreciate if someone would comment on my story :)

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Chapter 1:

Hussain: Hey Lulu

Lulu: Hi

Hussain: How was class?

Lulu: Fine, so do you remember my friend Sara

Hussain: Yeah...

Hussain: So can I join you?

Lulu: Oh sorry we were just about to leave Sara just remembered that 

she had some homework to do. I’ll see you later, bye.

Lulu grabbed Sara and ran away leaving Hussain just standing there. Sara 

really hates Hussain and she always got a feeling that he hates her too. 

She is usually a kind nice person but this guy irritates the hell out of her.

She still remembers that night when Lulu dragged her to go bowling with a couple of Saudi guys she met. Sara got a bad feeling from the first moment she met them but she stayed because she wouldn’t leave Lulu alone with three creepy guys. During that night it was obvious that Hussain really liked Lulu but as always Lulu was clueless. After that night Hussain kept texting Lulu every day and then she realized how much of a creep he is.

So, after that weird encounter they decided to go to Sara’s place. They got on the bus and for Sara’s surprise HE was on the bus, Ali. He was sitting there with his best friend Sultan.

Lulu: Ooh hey Sultan, how are you?

Sultan: Hey Lulu, I’m great, How are you?

Lulu: Great, didn’t know you were taking summer classes. Ooh right I forgot to introduce you this is Sara my friend.

 Sultan: Hey Sara nice to meet you

Sara: Nice to meet you too

Sultan: And this is my friend Ali, Ali these are Lulu and Sara.

Ali: Nice to meet you too,, Sara I think that you are with me in calculus right?

Sara: Yeah I think so.. (Sara couldn’t believe herself; she actually got introduced to him. She felt so grateful that Lulu was there to introduce them. She was so happy she could just burst into song. She actually has a chance with him. Maybe being friends is just enough for her.)

Ali: Then maybe we can do homework together or study together sometime?

Sara: Yeah sure. (At that moment Sara was just over the top)

Sultan: So where are you going?

Lulu: Sara’s house, where are you guys going?

Sultan: We are going to Ali’s house he just moved in.

Sara: Ooh congrats on the new place (She had the biggest smile on her face)

Ali: Thank you

Sara: So this is our stop

Ali: Really it’s ours too.

Sara: Ooh I guess we are neighbors now.

Sultan: So we will see you later. We should all hang out sometime.

Lulu: Yeah just call me anytime and we’ll plan something.

In Sara’s house:

Lulu: That guy Ali is cute.

Sara: Yeah he is..

Lulu: So?

Sara: So what?

Lulu: So you’re together in class.

Sara: Yeah

Lulu: Come on Sara a’9b6lch eya

Sara: Lol entee kela “bt’9b6enee”,, and you know I’m not that type of girl.

Lulu: Ma feeha shee you will start as friends and then you don’t know what’s gonna happen.

Sara: I don’t know...

Lulu: Just think about it.

To be continued…

An intro to the story world

She felt so lost out of the world. She doesn’t like this feeling. She kept thinking how did I screw up my life this much. She is juggling so many lies that she can’t even know what is real anymore. But, she knows one thing to be true to be real. He is real. She never thought of herself as one of those girls, who would crush on a guy who does not even know she exists. She used to make fun of her cousins when they told her about guys they don’t even know.

He was different or maybe she was different. She has changed so much since she came to the US.  She never imagined that she would see him face to face. He was always just a fantasy a picture on Facebook, a voice on twitter. Till one day, the first day of summer classes. She was on her way to class lost in her own thoughts. When she walked into class and saw HIM. She sat in the seat behind him, not believing that he was right there so close but so out of reach at the same time. That was the day when it all changed, when the fantasy turned into reality. 

Let me introduce you to the characters of the story:

Sara is a 20 year old Saudi girl studying in the US. She is short, thin, and beautiful with long dark brown hair and light brown eyes. She is nice, funny, a bit shy and smart.

Lulu is a 20 year old Kuwaiti girl. She’s Sara’s best friend studying with her in the same college. She is medium height, petite, very thin and beautiful. She has dark black hair, dark brown eyes and for some reason all the guys have a crush on her.

Ali is a 20 year old Saudi guy who studies in the same college as Sara and Lulu. He is handsome, tall and thin. He has brown hair, deep dark brown eyes that can pierce into your soul.

Sultan is a 21 year old Saudi guy. He is very hot, handsome, tall and tanned.  He has short black hair and beautiful eyes. He is a bit arrogant but sweet when you get to know him. He is Ali’s best friend.

Samar is an 18 years old Saudi girl. Just graduated from high school has a cute baby face, a bit tall, has brown hair and dark brown eyes. She is Sara’s best friend/cousin.

Sara was sitting in the library’s coffee shop waiting for Lulu to finish class. She was lost in her own thoughts. She couldn’t believe that he was actually in her class. She finally can have the chance to get to know him. She was contemplating how to tell Lulu about her crush. Lulu was in a long distance relationship that Sara didn’t approve of, but she would never tell her friend that and risk hurting her feeling. Sara was not the type of girl that would date or have a relationship with guys. She felt so confused she needed to decide to go after what her heart wants or listen to her brain and sticking to her morals. Her train of thought was interrupted by Lulu who just popped out of nowhere.

Lulu: Alooo Sara, earth to Sara where did you go? Did the aliens kidnap you?

Sara: Ooh hey Lulu sorry I was just thinking about…

Lulu: About what? Come on spill it. 

Sara: Nothing just life. So, how was class?

 Lulu: Oh my god you wouldn’t imagine who is with me in class?

Sara: Who?

Lulu: The hot twins. I can’t believe it. I so wanna be their friend they are just too awesome.

Sara: Haha ok don’t get too excited.

Lulu: This class is going to be great. But, one thing is ruining it.

Sara: What?

Lulu: You remember that creep Hussain the one that had a crush on me?

Sara: All of them have crushes on you..

Lulu: Hey you poop

Sara: Just kidding,, Yeah I remember him how could I forget he called me weird and I’m still pissed.

Lulu: Well he is with me in class. And he asked me out for lunch but, I told him that I have plans with you and ran away. This is going to be annoying.

Sara: Ooops!! Look isn’t that him heading over here?

To be continued…